Chapter 7

The Importance of Interpersonal Skills

• I will pay more for the ability to deal with people than for any other ability under the sun. -John D
• Be courteous to all, but intimate with a few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must under go and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation. -George Washington
• When you are good to others, you are best to yourself. -Benjamin Franklin
• It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Some Factors that prevent building and Maintaining Positive Relationships:

1. Selfishness
2. Lack of courtesy
3. Inconsiderate behavior
4. Not meeting commitments
5. Rude behavior
6. Lack of integrity and honesty
7. Self centeredness
8. Arrogance
9. Conceit

• GREED: is like a sea water; the more you drink, the more thirstier you get.
• Egotism is the anesthetic that deadens the pain of stupidity. -Knute Rockne
• Jealousy is...a tiger that tears not only its prey but also its own raging heart. -Michael Beer

• TRUST: All relationships are TRUST relationships.

Factors that build TRUST;

1. Reliability
2. Consistency
3. Respect
4. Fairness
5. Openness
6. Congruence
7. Competence
8. Integrity
9. Acceptance
10. Character
11. Courage

Chapter 6

Self Esteem

• what a man thinks of himself; that is what determines, or rather indicates, his fate. 

-Henry David Thoreau

Some comparison characteristics of people with high and low Self-Esteem:

High Self Esteem                                                  Low Self Esteem

#Talk about ideas                                                    #Talk about people

#Caring Attitude                                                      #Critical attitude

#Humility                                                                 #Arrogance

#Respects authority                                                 #Rebels against authority

#Courage of conviction                                           #Goes along to get along

#Confidence                                                           #Confusion

#Concerned about character                                   #Concerned about reputation

#Assertive                                                              #Aggressive

#Accepts responsibility                                           #Blames the whole world

#Self interest                                                          #Selfish

#Optimistic                                                            #Fatalistic

#Understanding                                                     #Greedy

#Willing to learn                                                    #Know it all

#Sensitive                                                             #Touchy

#Solitude                                                              #Lonely

#Discuss                                                              # Argue

#Guided                                                               #Misguided

#Discipline                                                           #Distorted sense of freedom

#Internally driven                                                 #Externally driven

#Respects others                                                 #Looks down on others

#Enjoy decency                                                   #Enjoy vulgarity

#Knows limits                                                      #Everything goes

#Giver                                                                 #Taker

  

Positive Self Esteem                                            Negative Self Esteem

*Self respect                                                           *Self put down

*Self confidence                                                     *Self doubt

*Self worth                                                             *Self abuse

*Self acceptance                                                     *Self denial

*Self love                                                                *Self centeredness

*Self knowledge                                                      *Self deceit

*Self discipline                                                         *Self indulgence

• Freedom is not procured by a full enjoyment of what is desired but controlling the desire.

-Epictetus

• Our privileges can be no greater than our obligations. The protection of our rights can endure no longer than the performance of our responsibilities. -John F. Kennedy

• Associate yourself with people of good quality if you esteem your reputation,for it is better to be alone than to be in bad company. -George Washington
• Patience creates confidence, decisiveness, and a rational outlook, which eventually leads to success.

-Brian Adams

• A good beginning makes a good ending. -English proverb

Self Esteem-Building a positive attitude

1. Read life stories of people who have turned negative into positives. Make reading good books or listening to inspirational audio tapes part of your daily routine.
2. Regularly and systematically commit a portion of your time and/or money to charitable activity without any expectations in cash or kind.
3. Stay away from negative influences. Don't give into peer pressure.
4. Practice giving and receiving sincere compliments graciously and gracefully.
5. Start accepting responsibility for your behavior and actions.
6. Practice self discipline even when it is not comfortable.
7. Associate with people of high moral character.
8. Be creative and find ways to turn your weakness into strengths.
9. Practice patience; persevere even if the results are not visible.

Simple Truth About Life

A Simple Truth About:

1. Honesty;

• It is much easier to speak only what is true because lies are just like boomerangs; they will soon come back to you.  

2. Money;

• Possessions do not determine your wealth and that your plastic credit cards are debt-detrimental to your health.

3. Loss;

• When you loss someone who is a part of who you are; time will surely heal the wound, but it wouldn't erase the scar.

4. Stress;

• It is okay to answer "No" with strong tenacity; for even a large porous sponge reaches its capacity.

 5. Success;

• Success should not be measured in what you will buy or own; but in the pride you feel, in the person you are with when you are all alone.

6. Simplicity;

• The phrase "Less is More" is absolutely true; with too much of what you don't need, its hard to find the things you do.

7. Anger;

• The words are permanent; hearts can not be unbroken and saying "I am sorry" can not retrieve angry words that have spoken.

8. First Impressions;

• Not to rely on first impressions for things aren't always as they seem. Sometimes the very smallest player is the best one on the team.

9. And finally A Simple Truth About Life;

• There are certain things that may never be fully understood; for life isn't always fair, but it is still pretty darn good.